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The Final Bentdown
The other say Bentley had the cheeck to ask me why people think he's gay. Ha! Today he topped it of by starting to this sort of gay jazz hand wave and a matching dance. This is thepaek of a list of many things that cause people to doubt his sexuality.
Firstly, and my personal pet-hate, he constantly tells boys to "sook me" while grabbing his balls.
He watches wrestling just to see the half naked men and his favourite wrestler is China-god knows what the fuck he/she is.
He agreed to go to the prom wearing a dress and makeup if we can raise £150, so people we need money, any donations will be welcome.
He does the gay hand thing too often to be healthy.
Fortunately he has not reached the stage of kissing everyone and calling everyone 'darling' and 'you dirty bitch'. But it can't be too long now...
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The Danny Dictionary
You may or may not know big Danny, he is the man in case you didn't know. Anyway, Danny has many annoying sayings that he chimes off everyday. Here are some of them and a translation, just in case you want to learn how to speak Danny.
1. How d'you like them apples?
-How do you like that?
2. Put that in your pipe and smoke it!
-I'm right your not, so fuck you.
3. In a pig's eye!
-Aye, that'll be right!
4. The weekend starts here.
-Physics with Mr Logue next.
5. Time to go.
-The bell's gonna go in exactly 3-2-1.......
6. I think you'll find your wrong Chrissy.
-Said way too many times with a very smug look on his face while nodding his head slowly.
7. I think I'll have two meal deals today.
-I better eat someting or I might have to eat Cheesey, hmmmmm, cheese......
8. Danny made a boo boo.
-Oops, i didn't mean to eat him honestly.
9. I have my sources. (done while tapping nose)
-I copied my big sisters Physics homework from two years ago.
10. I'm from Crookedholm, not Hurlford, its a completely different place.
-No, it's not Dan, you're in denial, admit it, you run the HBA.
11. Disregard.
-Never mind, I talk mince, ignore me.
12. The woman in the canteen won't let me have two meal deals anymore, and one just doesn't fill me up...
-Feed me, feed me, FEEEED MEEEEE!!!!!!!
13. But its not real money sir, its Newtons.
-Not Mr Logue's favourite line.
14. So Chrissy did you do the homework.
-Danny is our personal walking homework diary (and he copies it off his sisters old jotters).
15. Their are benefits of my mum being head of the school board.
-I get to sit in the front row at shows at get a great view of Bentley making an arse os himself.
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